Looking for support, lonely, scared, angry, young

Welcome to HealthRcovered’s Chronic Pain patient community. You can also read doctor approved Chronic Pain Articles and watch Chronic Pain Videos.
7 posts / 0 new
Last post
SadAthlete
Offline
Last seen: 3 days 7 hours ago
Title: Member
Joined: 12/05/2014 - 1:08am
Looking for support, lonely, scared, angry, young

I feel like my youth and life has been taken from me, its like im the only one out of everyone I know who has a condition like mine that restricts them from pretty much everything. While everyone else is at the gym lifting, or training for there next marathon I am just struggling to stand on one leg at work somedays. I am thankful that I can do a little bit of resistance training and go in the pool but still, my condition lingers 24/7

One year ago I had a bad back muscle pull in the weight room, woke up the next day with spasms etc.... Two weeks later the neuro symptoms down my right side started and got progressively worse. I used to be a runner, cyclist, I loved athletics and living a healthy active lifestyle. I haven't even started my career yet, managing the burning pain while I stand at work is just to much emotionally at times. I can't believe this has happened to me, I feel so alone at times, no one understands.... Im reaching out on here today after being a member for a while because im just so sad inside. I miss the old me so much, its like my sense of reality has been altered and all I feel is emptiness with this chronic condition. How does a young body like mine fall apart so easy, I always struggled with running injuries during my 13 year career but I never thought my back would go on me like this.

I have seen two sports doctors, neurologist, back specialist, massage, chiropractor, had mri/emg/blood work and doing physiotherapy at the moment which is doing nothing really it seems . I have paid for all this therapy out of pocked at stuff to as i am not insured. How does a young guy like me who's just barely started life cope, I just don't know how..... I am seeing a psychiatrist at the end of this month, pain management doctor as well. I just want to hear peoples voices on here etc...

advertisement
valsson
Offline
Last seen: 1 week 19 hours ago
Title: Member
Joined: 10/11/2015 - 4:00pm
You're not alone

I can relate.

I am now 25 years old and have been dealing with pain almost my whole life but the past 5 or 6 years have been severe.

I was born with a plexus (shoulder) injury on my left arm leaving me with limited movement and about 50% strength. In the later years of high school I began to develop a back pain which lead to chronic pain in my lower back. I'm still dealing with that. Three years ago my right arm (the good arm) began to fail me as i got a mild nerve pain which ran down my arm, swelling in the shoulder and pain in the shoulder joint with pain now going up to my neck.

I've been in and out of clinics for the past 6 years seeing doctors, physical therapists, chiropractors, surgeons and a lot of specialist. I've gone through multiple MRI, x-ray's , EMR (nerve test), steroid injections etc. Nothing and nobody can explain the pain or my condition. I live in a country with broken healthcare where doctors and specialist don't have time or funding to research each person thoroughly. Instead if you don't fit their criteria they will just send you to the next one.

I was and still am an athletic person, I cycle , go to the pool and do yoga etc. But the pain has limited my activities greatly, I used to be in fencing, for 8 years, my passion but because of the pain I had to quit. I used to play the guitar. I currently work in IT in healthcare and love computers but each day at work is excruciating because of the pain in my arm.

So like you I'm kinda getting at the end of the road here. I feel like I have tried everything. I'm constantly angry, scared and the worst is that I have watch my family and my girlfriend slowly become helpless because of the condition. My advice is to keep talking about your situation as it progressis (for better or worse). If you feel like you can't speak to a family member then speak to a psychologist or someone who can listen. Make a plan, what you have been doing and what you are going to try next, it helps..

If you want to talk, please send me a line.

Savage
Online
Last seen: 2 min 14 sec ago
Title: Moderator
Joined: 02/04/2011 - 8:18am
Hello valsson and Welcome....

Welcome to Spine-Health
Please click on link for helpful information!

I am not a medical professional. Anything I write is from my own experiences.

Skpheonix22
Offline
Last seen: 6 days 22 hours ago
Title: Member
Joined: 10/12/2015 - 8:03am
I think these are normal feelings

I'm new here, and as I read your post, this is the exact reason I joined. I think voicing your feelings, even if to complete strangers is a step in the right direction. I've been fighting chronic neck problems for over 2 years now. I don't feel like its something I can discuss with my circle. so I'm here. Hopefully pain management can help you. They helped me quiet a bit. **hope you find relief.

Solshine
Offline
Last seen: 1 day 8 hours ago
Title: Member
Joined: 10/07/2015 - 8:52pm
I can completely understand

I don't know how old you are but I'm 39 and I also feel like I'm too young for this as many of us do on this site. I have been active all my life , a trainer , kickboxing instructor,spinning instructor just a gym rat for a long long time and I've been down completely for approximately 5 months with pain and then surgery. I was injured in a wreck at 16 and everything was up hill battle when it happened and each time I irritated my back, Keeping a positive mind frame is hard but sooooo necessary. I wish you luck with pain management because unfortunately it never helped me. I told all my fitness friends on Facebook that I love them but I have to hide them for now because their fitness posts were making me hate them lol . No one understands how sad it makes you to not be able to workout unless they too share your passion so I completely understand but keep your head , this too shall pass.

Savage
Online
Last seen: 2 min 14 sec ago
Title: Moderator
Joined: 02/04/2011 - 8:18am
Hello Skpheonix22 and Welcome.....

Welcome to Spine-Health
Please click on link for helpful information!

I am not a medical professional. Anything I write is from my own experiences.

gcapoor
Offline
Last seen: 16 hours 14 min ago
Title: Member
Joined: 10/18/2015 - 3:36pm
You're not alone :)

I'm so sorry you're in this much pain and you feel like you're life is unfair. I understand this all to well.

To cut a really long story short : Ive had chronic pain since I was 22. I've had 2 herniated discs, root blocks, adhesion removals, spinal surgeries for said disc and unlimited hours of physiotherapy. But at 27, I am still unable to get off this bed and get a job or study further or do anything that requires standing/sitting for long hours. It feels like crap and I know that. Your friends, as understanding as they are, have these healthy lives where they can travel or enter marathons or make plans while you need to see where your pain level is at even to commit for dinner.

But you're not alone. That's the best thing about this forum. People are honest and descriptive of their lives and you feel a sense of kinship because what happened to you is unfair and terrible but there are people out here who help beautifully in managing it.

I hope you start feeling better soon. Pain management has a lot of empathic doctors who understand the half lives we live. Life is as young as we want it to be, or thats the way I ve thought it. I'm going to live my 30's like my 20's

Take care of yourself

advertisement